The Burden of Choice

Bring a Friend Sunday
Rev. Mark Stringer
First Unitarian Church of Des Moines
9/26/04

 

Readings

 

“It Matters What We Believe” by Sophia Lyon Fahs

 

Some beliefs are like walled gardens.  They encourage exclusiveness, and the feeling of being especially privileged.

 

Other beliefs are expansive and lead the way into wider and deeper sympathies.

 

Some beliefs are like shadows, clouding children’s days with fears of unknown calamities.

 

Other beliefs are like sunshine, blessing children with the warmth of happiness.

 

Some beliefs are divisive, separating the saved from the unsaved, friends from enemies.

 

Other beliefs are bonds in a world community, where sincere differences beautify the pattern.

 

Some beliefs are like blinders, shutting off the power to choose one’s own direction.

 

Other beliefs are like gateways opening wide vistas for exploration.

 

Some beliefs weaken a person’s selfhood.  They blight the growth of resourcefulness.

 

Other beliefs nurture self-confidence and enrich the feeling of personal worth.

 

Some beliefs are rigid, like the body of death, impotent in a changing world.

 

Other beliefs are pliable, like the young sapling, ever growing with the upward thrust of life.

        

 

“Window or Aisle?” by Sarah York

 

“Window or aisle?” the man at the counter asked as I prepared to board a plane for Detroit.

 

No mater how often I fly, I always pause to make the choice:  to take a window seat means being able to get a God’s eye view of earth.  But what if I want to go to the restroom?  It’s such a bother to have to ask people to move.  And I don’t like feeling trapped.

 

My answer is always the same:  “Window.”  To choose the window is to choose to see.  Whether I am identifying a river or marveling at the play of moonlight on the ocean; whether the view is a patchwork of planted fields, a city showing off its neon finery, or a comforter of clouds, I am filled with a deep sense of awe.  Sometimes, as the plane moves through a storm, breaking through the clouds and into the sun, my own spirit opens up to invite in the expanse of beauty.  There is always something to see—always something I have never seen before.

 

Knowing that to choose the window is an invitation to beauty, awe, and wonder—that it is even an opportunity to break through the cloudiness of my own spirit—why do I always pause to make the decision?  Each time we get a seat on a plane we are invited to choose to be touched by the world or to remain complacent and take it for granted.  We are invited to choose beauty or fear, vision or convenience.  Each day of our lives, in fact, we are given the choice, “Window or aisle?”  Something inside me will always pause before I choose…but I think I’ll take the window.

 

 

Sermon

 

A cartoon has been on one of the bulletin boards near the church office for some time now.  Perhaps some of you have seen it.  It comes from the comic strip “Kudzu.”  The first couple of panels show a cheer being offered at a softball game: Gimme a W, gimme an H, gimme an A, gimme a T, gimme an E, a V, an E, an R, whadda-ya got?  “WHATEVER!”  In the final panel, one of the characters says, “I love playing the Unitarians.”

 

Now you can say a lot of things about Unitarian Universalists, but one thing is certain:  we like to laugh at ourselves. When I first read this cartoon I laughed, too…but the more I thought about it, the less funny it became. While it may be the common perception that anything goes in a UU church, in my view at least, this perception is simply not accurate. To be a UU means to stand for “whatever?”  I’d like to think not.

 

Of course, it is not difficult to see why people might have that impression of us.  As Unitarian Universalists we are not quiet about the fact that we encourage each other to construct our own unique theologies, not from a sacred text but with the stuff of our lives: the history of the human race and the religious perspectives that have emerged from it, the philosophical and ethical ponderings that continue to inform our existence, and our own unique experiences of the world that are a product of the creative interchange that occurs between us and our beautiful planet, its inhabitants, and the universe we all share.   We do not, as a rule, limit ourselves to dogmatic explanations of reality.  Instead, we support each other in our search for truth as we find it for ourselves…a truth that is ever-elusive and always subject to new interpretations as we gain the wisdom that comes from our experience of being alive.  In other words, we contend that revelation is not sealed…only to be found in one text or one religious perspective.  While there are some dogmatists among us…those who are fundamentalist in their attempt to eliminate anything religious from our religion…most of us are much more flexible and open to ideas about spirituality.  We humbly believe that revelation is continuous, always possible as long as we are open to the adventure that is life itself…an adventure with its share of misery and pain, as well as joy and delight.  An adventure that Albert Camus described as “our wretched and magnificent life.”

 

In my experience, Unitarian Universalism is a religious perspective that leaves room for other faiths, that recognizes the wisdom accessible in all the world’s religions, and that encourages people to choose to believe not simply what they want to believe…as though choosing a human response to the dual reality of being alive and having to die is something that arises from mere whimsy…like choosing a flavor of ice cream or a seat on an airplane.  On the contrary, Unitarian Universalism encourages people to choose what they as individuals must believe…not just whatever…but whatever their conscience and hearts and reason and passion tell them they should. 

 

So while UUs do in fact choose what we believe, essential in this choice is a sense of responsibility…a responsibility for what kind of impact these choices will have on our own lives and in the lives of others. Sorry Kudzu, but this responsibility is much greater than just “whatever.”

 

But if it is not just “whatever,” what is it?

 

I was thinking about this question, when, the other night, I caught a portion of a program that aired on PBS the other night called “The Question of God.”  A group of panelists with different areas of expertise had been gathered to discuss their ideas about the divine, however it may be defined, and its relationship to ethics and morality.  The topic being discussed while I was viewing was: Where do we get our concept of right and wrong…is it developed over time or is it intuitive…or as some would say, given to us by God?  It was the Jungian analyst on the show that spoke most directly to my Unitarian Universalist perspective:  She said it’s both…developed and intuitive…that our consciousness includes religious instinct, civil and moral codes, and history, and it’s up to us to keep all this stuff in dialogue with our experience as human beings.  The token atheist on the panel, the surprisingly congenial editor of Skeptic magazine, then asked a pointed, clarifying question:  Did the origin of moral sentiments (the notion of right and wrong) evolve through natural forces, culture and history, or did God put them in us?

Again the Jungian Analyst came through with what I thought was a wonderful UU-style response, “Why can’t it be both?”

 

Indeed, why can’t it be both?  After all, we cannot know for certain the origin of our souls, nor what happens to us when we die…and because we cannot know for certain, it logically follows, in my mind at least, that we should be free to choose the belief system that emerges not just from our intuition or possible endowment from God, but from our varied experiences as a participants in life itself. 

 

The question that seems to follow is, “How then can we…especially UUs who are not necessarily tied to any one notion of the divine…how can we develop a sense of ethics, a system of appropriate behavior, that is not just a reflection of our own egos…  a system that is more than just whatever?”  I think this question has the same foundation as the ones posed to us on a regular basis by those holding more orthodox faiths…questions like “Why do you call yourselves a church if everyone doesn’t believe in God?” or “Without a common understanding of God, how are you inspired to do good in the world?”

 

While I understand why these questions seem essential to those of more dogmatic faiths, I think they miss the point of what we do here. After all, despite our varied perceptions of God, from true believers to devoted atheists, UUs are inspired by the same basic moral code shared by most other religions:  the Golden Rule.  This idea, expressed in Christianity as “Do unto others as you would have them do unto you” is the common building block of most organized faiths, despite their different theologies and perceptions of the divine. I was reminded of how common this maxim is the other night when I, along with a few other members of our church, was a facilitator at an event called the “Golden Rule Conference.”  Sponsored by the Des Moines Area Religious Council (DMARC), this event brought together about 100 people from metro Des Moines, representing at least 10 different faith perspectives, to discuss the role of the Golden Rule in their religion and in their lives.  We were seated at tables in small groups, and then, one by one, we were instructed to share the Golden Rule as it is expressed in our faith tradition and then tell stories of how we try to live up to it.  At my table, we heard from a Jew, a Hindu, two Catholics, a follower of Christian Science, and me.  We all shared similar stories.  The Jew shared a line from the Torah: “What is hateful to you, do not do to your neighbor.”  The Hindu shared a passage from the Mahabharata: “Do not do to others what would cause pain if done to you.”  The Christians shared from the Bible and I explained that in Unitarian Universalism, we find the golden rule in our shared principles, which include affirming and promoting the inherent worth and dignity of all people and respect for interdependent web of existence of which we are a part.  After time had been given for everyone to speak, a representative from each table was asked to give a summary of what was discussed.

 

I learned a few things from this exercise.

 

First, I learned that everyone tries to follow the Golden Rule…or at least everyone who was present at this conference believes she/he does…despite our different faiths.  Second, during my small group sharing, I surprised myself by recognizing that my knowledge of the Golden Rule was as much a result of watching Sesame Street as a child (an experience I am now reliving with my daughter) as it was from going to the Presbyterian and Methodist churches of my youth.  And finally, I was reminded once again, that there are common threads running through our lives…threads woven together by our human history, our triumphs and our failures as a species…and that we each have a responsibility to acknowledge that our own perspectives… especially our ideas about God and religion…are never as important as what we choose to do with those perspectives…how we choose to live our lives from day to day.

 

I like how UU minister William Gardner put it: “We all have two religions: the religion we talk about and the religion we live.  It is our task,” he said, “to make the difference between these two as small as possible.”

 

The decisions of how we act on our beliefs (or our faith, if you will), then, are much more important than the beliefs we claim to hold.  And therein lies the “burden of choice” that is at the foundation of any religion…particularly Unitarian Universalism, a religion especially open to choice.  How do we decide what to do in the world, how to treat each other, how to be? 

 

It is so easy to want to withdraw from the world,

to throw up our hands in despair or disgust…or even disinterest…

to assume that if God does exist,

he, she or it will take care of us…so why should we bother? 

But I think we know somewhere deep within us,

maybe even too deep to admit,

that to wait for others to do for us

what we could be doing for ourselves,

is not just a resignation to the status quo,

it is a resignation to the spirit crushing notion

that we as humans are inherently impotent to improve our quality of life…or the conditions of this planet we share…

it is a resignation to the belief that our choices don’t make a difference after all…

it is a resignation to the only true atheism I think there is…

the atheism that rejects choice altogether…

the atheism yoked to nihilism…

the atheism that negates the redemptive power of human agency in the world…

no matter what we think we might believe about God. 

Indeed, I contend that anything that distracts or distances us from the

understanding that we have a responsibility to help create the kind of

world we want to inhabit is not only counterintuitive,

it is demonic.


Along these lines, I appreciate the story about a man who stood before God, his heart breaking from all the pain and injustice in the world?  “Dear God,” he cried out, “look at all the suffering, the anguish and distress in your world.  Why don’t you send help?”  God answers, “I did send help. I sent you.”[1]


While the lesson of this story is certainly not unique to Unitarian Universalism, I do believe this church, indeed the entire Unitarian Universalist movement, exists to remind us that we have choices in life…and how we choose to live matters greatly…both to us and to our earthly companions…indeed, it matters much more than what we each might believe (or not believe) about the nature of God.

 

We gather here each week to celebrate that we are alive and that this gift of life comes with a responsibility to be true to ourselves, true to each other, and true to what together we can become…
a more peaceful, loving, and just society where we treat each others as we would want to be treated. 
And we send ourselves out into the world at the end of the service each week with the expectation that we will be open to life, expecting to love and prepared to serve.

 

Dogma aside, isn’t this what religion is all about?

 

In one of our readings this morning, Sarah York shares how she ponders the choice of whether to take a seat on the aisle of an airplane or a seat by the window.  If she sits on the aisle, she will be closer to the bathroom, closer to the exit, and farther away from the reality of where she is going and where she has been.   It’s a choice that she says always makes her pause.  Maybe it’s the responsibility of the choice, the burden, if you will, that makes her pause.  She knows that her choice will not only have an impact on her day, it will say something about her

 

Perhaps I am stretching this metaphor too thin, but I believe how we choose to be participants in this church and this liberal religious faith it espouses is not all that different.  Unitarian Universalism gives us the option of a choice.  It’s up to us to accept or decline the invitation…to put ourselves in position to see the world as it truly is:  a world of different landscapes, populations, points of view and possibilities…a wretched and magnificent world where the mystery has more than one explanation, and each explanation that respects and embodies the Golden Rule has value and worth…

as long as we choose to make it so…

as long as we choose to make it so. 

I’d like to think that to embrace this Unitarian Universalist approach to religion is not to embrace just whatever.  Unitarian Universalism encourages us to embrace whatever leads us to act in such a way that life improves for ourselves, our neighbors, and the earth we share. 

Noted Unitarian Ralph Waldo Emerson captured this well when he wrote:

Five minutes of today are worth as much to me, as five minutes in the next millennium….Without any shadow of doubt, amidst this vertigo of shows and politics, I settle myself ever the firmer in the creed, that we should not postpone and refer and wish, but do broad justice where we are, by whomsoever we deal with, accepting our actual companions and circumstances, however humble or odious, as the mystic officials to whom the universe has delegated its whole pleasure for us.” [2]

 

In other words, the more accurate UU cheer might be:

Gimme a Y, gimme an E, gimme an S, a T, an O, an L, an I, an F, an E, whadda-ya got? YES TO LIFE…Whadda-ya got? YES TO LIFE.

Now that’s a burden I hope we all can choose to bear.

 

 



[1] Spiritual Literacy, Frederic and Mary Ann Brussat, eds. (New York: Touchstone, 1996), p. 327.

[2] From “Experience” quoted in Barry M. Andrews, Emerson as Spiritual Guide (Boston: Skinner House, 2003), p. 89.